flies from hell

[lynn]

I dreamed my ear ate a fly last night, and because I was still half asleep I spent ten minutes trying to dig it out before making myself leave it alone, I must have been mostly in la la land because I remember thinking that I'd make Ben go buy me an ear candle to get it out in the morning, until then all I could do was sleep with that ear down.
When I say my ear ate a fly I remember that buzzing noise that a fly makes when it's eaten by a spider happening right inside my ear, then a crunching sound which in my half addled state I interpreted as my ear canal closing up to capture the fly, and I swear i could feel it in there wriggling but that could have been me trying to get it out and injuring myself.
first thing i did when I woke up this morning properly was realise I was lying with that ear up, freak about the fly, then flip over on my other side. That woke me up enough for me to realise how stupid I'd been. A fly would never fit in my ear, my ears are tiny!

[Gilberto]

Yikes. I hate that. It's like the earwig from Night Gallery. I remember watching Star Trek 2 when I was a kid and being totally freaked out.

[lynn]

insects in your orifices man, that's why it's in horror movies; because it's just wrong. 'taint natural

[professordave]

Mar 8, 2010 20:08:50 GMT -5 lynn said:

insects in your orifices man, that's why it's in horror movies; because it's just wrong. 'taint natural

And yet it does happen. The worst example I can think of can be seen in the movie Mountains of the Moon, which is based on the lives of two English explorers, Sir Richard Burton and John Speke. In one scene, Speke is camping in Africa, and falls asleep. A large beetle crawls into his ear and starts biting. Screaming in agony, Speke grabs a knife and jams it into his ear, killing the beetle but rendering him deaf in that ear. The fact that this really happened adds to the horror of that scene. Its one of the main reasons why I will NEVER travel to Africa.

[lynn]

ugh, I know, you always hear horror stories about how some kid got a leech growing in his eyelid or something. And I reckon everyone's had a fly up their nose at least once. Or is that just me?

[drivebyluna]

I had a mosquito try and go up my nose once.

[ringoosu]

Google Botfly. I dare you.

[professordave]

Mar 9, 2010 17:21:26 GMT -5 ringoosu said:

Google Botfly. I dare you.

Done. Luckily, I have all the household ingredients needed to kill a botfly larva infestation. Just in case.

[lynn]

so the cure isn't a knife in the ear? awesome!

[Gilberto]

Turns out a knife in the ear isn't good for most situations. Strange, because it seems like such a great idea.

[lynn]

You're not thinking Sean, a knife in the ear is good for a lot of situations... as long as it's not your ear you're sticking the knife into.

[drivebyluna]

Well, if you do decide to stick a knife in your ear, I'll be here to teach you ASL so you can communicate with the rest of us.

[lynn]

Considering the way I communicate with you most of the time is by interwebs I think I'll be fine when the inevitable occurs and I lose my hearing to a blade in the ear. Most people aren't that interesting to listen to anyway, so it might be a good think. Actually I'm thinking of reaching for that knife now...

[gretl]

Oh the irony of that last post on a site spawned by a PODCAST.